Why does ‘life change’ bring on criticism from friends and family?
Why is it that anytime you want to improve or make a major change in your life, those close to you (family, friends) will often tell you that you are making a huge mistake?
They might say, ” I understand that you are not happy in your relationship, but who is?” or ” True love is a fairytale anyway. You should just stay in your relationship even though you are miserable.” Regarding a career change or taking a risk in business you will often hear, ” There is a good chance you will fail because most businesses do.” or ” Why would you want to take a chance when you have such a secure job. Following your passion never brings any money.”
There can be a few reasons for this phenomena of life-changing criticism. One is that many people have a fear of change. When you begin to break out of the box, it will stir up the feeling of safety from those around you. In essence, they are projecting their fear of change onto you. The same goes for failure. They will often project their own insecurities or fear of failure onto you. Basically, they are throwing their fear all over you. This is a giant toss that you do not want to catch! Another popular unhealthy emotion that arises when you begin to change or improve your circumstances is jealousy. When you accelerate, grow or rise above in your personal or career life, the insecure jealous folks may criticize you in order to bring you down and ultimately raise themselves up. I know this is not what you want to hear about those that you want encouragement or support from. But it happens.
You cannot change someone’s belief or point of view through trying to convince them verbally. Their change in attitude may come over time as they watch you succeed. However, you can protect yourself in a few ways.
1) When they begin to offer their unsolicited negativity, you can respond by saying, “Thank you for your opinion. However, next time I want it I will let you know.”
2) Put your head down and move toward your goal. Only open yourself up to those that are supportive of your new journey. Never let anyone tell you that your dreams cannot be done.
Have you had any experience of family and friends criticizing you for making new changes or transitions in your life? I would love to hear your story. Why don’t you share by commenting below?
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Allison Maslan, CEO of Pinnacle Global Network, is the Wall Street Journal Best Selling Author of Scale or Fail, which is endorsed by Daymond John and Barbara Corcoran of Shark Tank. Allison’s built 10 successful companies starting out at age 19.
Now she and her team of CEO Mentors pay it forward by helping business owners scale their companies, fast-track their success, and create a more meaningful life. Pinnacle Global Network, a world leader in scaling companies and empowering business leaders has guided thousands of CEO's and Founders to success over the past decade. Allison’s been featured in Inc., Success, Fortune, Fast Company, and Forbes Magazines, is a regular contributor to Entrepreneur Magazine, and a featured expert on ABC, CBS, NBC, CNN, and Fox across the US. She is also the host and producer of The Scale or Fail Show podcast, and the Women Who Own it Podcast in partnership with WBENC, the largest certifier of women-owned businesses in North America.