Is Striving For Perfection Choking You?
Are you living your life to the fullest at this moment in time? Do you have the life that you have always dreamed of? If so, congratulations! Meditate a few moments each day on the goodness that you have experienced from your great fortune. If your answer is no, it is never too late to start.
So many of my coaching clients tell me they don’t reach their goals because they want everything perfect before they move forward. They are striving for perfection and it is killing them. What is the point of “perfect” any way? They want a perfectly clean house, to say the perfect words and to do perfect work at all times. Pressure filled expectations are a sure way to turn any goal into a ball and chain. Many people resist attempting new challenges or setting new goals because they are afraid they will not perform up to their ridiculous expectations. The result, they give up before they ever begin. Then the feelings of disappointment and failure set in.
I started taking modern dance in my 30’s. The room was full of young women and men that had been dancing since childhood. My mind was aghast as the dance instructor got in front of the class and proceeded to dance several eloquent steps that we were supposed to immediately mirror. I knew I was in trouble as the class was spinning one way and I was tripping the other way (Picture I Love Lucy and the Rockettes). Through this experience, I learned to laugh at myself and let go of the notion of doing it perfectly. It was not a possible to could keep up with these experts; and attempting to was just way too much pressure. Once the light bulb came on that I could do something for the fun of it, I relaxed about the outcome. And wouldn’t you know it, I was able to perform in several dance presentations and I had a blast.
If you are not putting yourself out there, reaching toward what you really want because you are afraid of not being perfect, you are missing out on the juiciness of your life. It is the non-perfect part that will be most memorable and uniquely you.
I welcome your comments and questions!